Working with Separated Parents
Longitudinal research now exists on minimising the impact of divorce and separation on children. Veiled acrimony between parents can be devastating for children's emotional development. Parents' ability to remain emotionally available to children rather than becoming overwhelmed by parental stress, anger and grief is the other major factor in childhood adjustment to divorce. As a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner registered with the Federal Attorney General's Department, I am conversant with this literature and trained to facilitate newly separating and long-separated parents alike:
- To re-establish a non-toxic space between the parents in which the children can move and grow.
- To determine the best living arrangements for the children.
- To prepare Parenting Plans that document what time the children will spend with each parent.
- Understand the importance of being respectful when talking about (or to) the other parent and his/her family or new partner.
- Prepare agreed Codes of Behaviour to cover potentially problematic situations such as phone contact, drop off and pick up times, school functions, new partners introductions and protocols.
- Discuss different parenting approaches to issues such as bed times where different parenting styles are creating issues.
The patient initially struggles with coming to think about an unthinkable diagnosis. Counselling can assist in managing difficult emotions in the early stages of Alzheimer's. Later, the patient's humanity can become the causality in the management of their safety and physical needs. Who stops to think about: What is the emotional message behind stories they repeat? What is the trigger for their increased agitation? Why are they escaping from their care environment?
Discuss parenting tasks such as bed times where different parenting styles are creating issues.